half year mark

this past thursday was my half year mark being here.
who knew...who knew...
this week has been quite trying.
I was unfortunately suffering from a terrible cold and some other type of illness that caused all of my joints stiff and aching....muscle weakness...and my frontal lobes all numb (brain-wise, that is).

monday was the worst day, i was mostly delirious and unable to really walk,
I really needed to go back home but one of my co-workers was already sick
and the head teacher was covering for her.
My new supervisor is..well...new, so she had no idea how and what to teach my classes and was freaking out.
So i sucked it up and went through with the classes.
And i do not remember anything that i taught and my daily report notes were pure scribbles.

The next day, i was a little bit better, but still not good enough.
I blacked out a few times during mid sentence in my classes.
So for the most of the week, i've been trudging around school...
but friday i felt back to normal
and now, i'm much better.

On another note, today is fatman's bday celebration.
I can't believe i'm missing it.
For the past few years, i've been there preparing and planning his parties...
and now i'm not.
i've somewhat begun to reminisce about the people and life i've left behind back in toronto.
It feels like i'm back in highschool all over again
and as many people who knew me back then and after:
I hated highschool.
well, not all of highschool but the majority of it.
I worked so hard to avoid as much as any life similar to highschool as possible..
and what happens?! i fly across an ocean and i land right into it.
wonderful. just wonderful.

Do you know what gets me down?
not work, not money.....it's people.
When ppl try to pull you down with them to their crap attitude.
Honestly, a girl just wants to get by with a pretty decent attitude and perspective... and here people are trying to muck it up.
Of course i'm not saying i'm willfully blinding myself from issues and problems,
but seriously, there are so many ways and approaches to do things.
Such as an aptly titled short story: 100 ways to skin a cat
And i'm just picking one where the killer doesn't have to do much work.... and the cat is as high as a kite...before quickly passing away.
And 'no', i would not use hemlock.

blah, i'm tired and i'm utterly tired from passing the entire CoD4 on my own.

So last words:
I have been extremely accommodating towards many things.
I've changed and shared many things with friends, strangers, and lower.....
but there are certain things that I refuse to budge on
and THIS is one of them.
I own this.
I am the one in full control,
and it shall stay that way.